Your Barista Today Is
by singingofgallifrey
Summary: AU for; You're my jerk barista who purposely screws up my name when I order my caffeine fix'. Braxiatel/Narvin. Romana/Leela.


Usually Irving Braxiatel didn't have time to stop and read what was on the chalkboard sign that was usually stood outside his favourite coffee shop, ' _Pandora's box.'_ But today, the sign certainly caught his attention with a slightly few weird sentences and colourful, childish drawings that he simply couldn't help but smirk at;

 _Today your barista is;_

 _A cute penguin_

 _Very much single_

 _..._ And was that a picture of a penguin with a six pack serving coffee in the corner of the chalkboard that Irving could see?

He gave a deep chuckle and a slight shake of the head before he stepped inside his favourite coffee shop where he as soon as he opened the door, a clatter of dangling door decorations could be heard and he was immediately greeted with the smell of coffee and tea and home-made pastries that looked like were cooking in the oven in the back.

By far, this was Irving's Braxiatel's favourite coffee shop to come too out of all the ones in London. He had discovered it a few weeks back when he was running late for a meeting and ever since then, he was being served by the same handsome, slightly grumpy and green-eyed barista (not to mention, Irving simply couldn't help but admire his arse every time the barista had to bend over in his pair of well-fitted jeans).

Not that Irving had a crush on the barista that was.

...All right, maybe a little bit of a crush. But he won't admit that to anyone. That was just his little secret.

The only problem was, was that the barista himself was a bit of a jerk. Whether that was just aimed directly at him personally or to other customers, he couldn't tell but the barista always made sure to purposefully spell his name wrong even after Irving had spelled it out-loud to him multiple of times. Last week, instead of putting, 'Brax' on the plastic cup, he put ' _Braxy'_ with a roughly drawn heart that looked like it had been furiously scribbled onto.

That and Irving didn't even know the barista's name. All the other staff members had wore name tags but this handsome jerk of a barista seemed to think that name badges were too good for him.

He walked up to the counter where his favourite grumpy barista was standing behind the counter, looking bored and was wearing a smart, plain white shirt and black jeans.

"Good morning," Irving greeted him cheerily.

His favourite barista looked up. Not remotely surprised to see him. "Oh, it's you."

"Of course it's me. I hope you weren't expecting anyone else, I am your new favourite customer after all." He smirked.

The barista narrowed his eyes at him. "You're not usually in this early."

Excellent! So the barista had been paying attention to him just as much as Irving had been paying attention to the barista. This was the first time the barista, as far as Irving was aware, had paid any slightest interest towards him. "Very observant. I actually have an early meeting today," He replied. "I'll just order a-"

"A classic Chai tea latte and a strawberry muffin?" The barista cut across him and Irving's lips twitched up into amusement before nodding. "Coming right up." He walked over to the other side of the counter where he had his back facing Irving as he began to make his usual Chai tea latte.

As the barista worked, Irving tilted his head slightly to admire the man's backside and arse. "So," He began idly. "Are you pursing for a boyfriend? Or a girlfriend even?" He wasn't exactly sure what Narvin's preferences were.

The man turned around so sharply, he almost spilt boiling hot water onto his hands. " _Excuse me?!"_

"The sign out of the front," Braxiatel couldn't help but chuckle before he jerked his thumb towards the way he had just came from. "It says that you're a very cute penguin who is very much single."

The barista gritted his teeth before swearing something very unintelligent in Welsh as he raced out from behind the counter and Irving watched him calmly as he ripped the door open to take a look at the sign. " _Leela!"_ The barista yelled angrily from the top of his lungs, marching back in a few seconds later.

Some laughter and a fit of giggles could be heard from the back of the coffee shop and two flustered, giggling women came out together, holding hands. One was a gingered haired woman and another a blonde.

"Yes Narvin?" The woman with the ginger hair-Leela-it said on her name badge spoke. She gave her colleague a smirk.

"What the hell have you done with the sign?!"

This time, the blonde, Romana laughed. "We are only stating the facts Narvin. You know very well it is all true and penguin is your nickname." She turned to Irving."It's all true. Narvin here is a very cute penguin and he is single and ready to mingle."

"Not sure about the six-pack though." Leela snorted.

"Leela! Romana!" Narvin hissed, the tip of his ears turning bright pink from embarrassment.

"I recommend your phone number or email address," Leela winked at Irving who was watching the whole interaction calmly.

"Come on Leela, let's leave the boys to it." Romana took her hand, taking them both back behind the coffee shop once more.

"I'm going to kill you both for this!" Narvin glared at the retreating women. If looks could kill, they would have been dead on the spot.

"No you won't!" They both yelled back, a smug tone in their voice as though they were used to Narvin's weak threats.

Irving snickered at this and Narvin turned round to glare at him. "Don't _you_ start!"

"I wasn't starting anything." But still, Irving continued to snicker.

"No, but I can tell you are thinking of it." Narvin huffed in annoyance and he finished making Irving's Chai tea latte and went to get him his usual strawberry muffin from the display cabinet.

"Your name is Narvin, correct?" Irving asked, remembering what the two ladies called his favourite barista.

He looked up at Irving. "Yes. Though, my Welsh name is Narvinectralonum but it's much easier to just call me Narvin."

"Narvinectralonum? That's quite a mouthful."

Narvin snorted. "You should try saying Romana's full name." He jerked his head back in the direction of the women. "Romanadvoratrelundar. Now try saying _that_ whilst drunk."

Irving laughed softly. "I much prefer your name and besides, it appears Romana is already taken." He did notice how close she and Leela seemed to be in those few short moments from before. That and he wouldn't mind at all screaming Narvin's name over and over again in bed as the two of them were entangled in the bed covers together, full of sweat and heavy musk after sex.

Narvin looked at him oddly as though he had grown two heads and Irving cleared his throat awkwardly before he quickly handed over the money to pay for his tea and muffin to Narvin. "I best get going to my meeting." He nodded a goodbye nod to Narvin and gathered his tea and muffin together before he walked towards the exit. Internally screaming at himself for being so foolish.

"Wait!"

Irving had just placed his left foot on the pavement outside, standing in the doorway of the coffee shop before he turned to look back at Narvin somewhat calmly.

"Do you really want to be..." Narvin coughed. "Well, my boyfriend? Did you really mean that?"

"Of course I meant it. I wouldn't have said anything otherwise." Irving replied calmly, smiling. "And really, you are quite handsome, didn't you know?" And those green eyes...Irving thought Narvin's eyes were the most beautiful he had ever seen.

Narvin looked flustered by the compliment, as though he was unsure how to take it. He scratched the back of his neck, his eyes meeting Irving's. "I wouldn't mind taking the sign's advice you know. Just this once."

Now Irving was smug. "So you'll recommend my phone number?" Narvin nodded. "Well then Narvin," He took a sip of the chai tea latte as though to add some effect. "First, you best make sure that nobody else sees the sign. Second, I'll see you tomorrow morning with my phone number and email address."

Narvin blinked with a smirk tugging at his lips. "Deal. I'll see you tomorrow then, _Braxy."_

Irving rolled his eyes at the silly nickname that he had seemed to have gained. If anybody else had called him that nickname in public, they would be dead before they could say sorry. But it was Narvin, so Narvin could be let off. "Actually, it's _Braxiatel._ But please, call me Irving." He sent Narvin a wink before stepping outside once more, Narvin watching him go.

"So? Did you get his number?" Irving could hear Leela shout from behind him.

"Drop it already Leela!" Narvin snapped with irritation at his co-worker who only laughed.

Irving smiled widely and as he walked to the meeting, he was humming all way way cheerily. _Thank you Leela and Romana,_ he thought as he took a bite from his muffin. _Thank you indeed._


End file.
